Type A and depression–What a *ucking cocktail
My Type A personality came out on Sunday.
I try to keep her under control, but she snuck out when I wasn’t paying close attention (meaning I was angry) and Bam! now I’m exhausted.
Type A and depression don’t go together well.
Ever since I had my breakdown over two years ago, I cannot do what I could push myself to do before.
Now my body says, “No way, Sister!” and I feel so lethargic I can’t help but pay attention.
It’s as if my body hits this switch inside me that says, “Oh, no you don’t!”
That’s the only way Type As would pay attention. We’re so fucking driven that we can’t see how driven we are.
So, now I’m resting to recuperate from doing too much and getting caught up in an old pattern that made me wickedly angry. That has made me wickedly angry ever since I was a little girl.
Now that I pay attention, I know what’s happening. That doesn’t mean it isn’t very scary sometimes, but I trust my body to let me know what’s what. And she’s being really clear with me this time.
So, I’m resting.
And I’m looking after myself so that I will feel better sooner rather than later.